Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
