At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
