Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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