OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
