38 yer olds are good kisserssss
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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