i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
