Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
