Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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