Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize