Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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