I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize