I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
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