don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
