Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
