I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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