I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
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