the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
