They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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