Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I got her a Nickelback box set.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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