Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Randomize
