i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
