its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
