the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Randomize
