i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
