Me. At least after what I've been through.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Randomize
