You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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