Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I'm like, not good at living.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize