Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
