TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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