u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
