porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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