and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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