Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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