She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
