just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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