Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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