I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
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