My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
