I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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