New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
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