Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize