Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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