I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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