OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
