did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Two words: blizzard sex
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
