and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
