thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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