So drunk its hurt
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
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