Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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