What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
