I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
